Prong Song

All lyrics and music contained in this web site are the sole property of Terry Prong and may not be used commercially with out written permission from the author.

CAUTION! ALL PRONG SONG COMPOSITIONS CONTAIN "SONG WORMS" THAT MAY BE IMPOSSIBLE TO REMOVE.

Got any good Bass jokes? Send them in  mjokes@prongssongs.com

A man is being led thru the jungle on a safari. He
begins to hear some really furious, pounding drums,
rolling along without end. After 15 minutes of this, he
asks the guide "When do the drums stop?" The guide
answers "Oh, the drums NEVER stop. Bad things happen
then." The man ponders this for about two hours more of
furious pounding, and says, irritated, "When do the drums stop?!?" "The drums never stop. Bad things happen when the drums stop." Finally, after 5 hours, the man asks "What bad thing happens when the drums stop?" "BASS SOLO."
 

Quite a number of years ago, the Seattle Symphony was
 doing Beethoven's Symphony No. 9 under the baton of
Milton Katims.

Now at this point, you must understand two things:

1. There's a quite long segment in this symphony where
    the basses don't have a thing to do. Not a single note
    for page after page.
2. There used to be a tavern called Dez's 400, right
     across the street from the Seattle Opera House, rather
     favored by local musicians.

It had been decided that during this performance, once the bass players had played their parts in the opening of the symphony, they were to quietly lay down their instruments and leave the stage, rather than sit on their stools looking and feeling dumb for twenty minutes.
Once they got backstage, someone suggested that they
trot across the street and quaff a few brews. When they got there, a European nobleman recognized that they were musicians, and bought them several rounds of drinks. Two of the bassists passed out, and the rest of the section, not to mention the nobleman, were rather drunk. Finally, one of them looked at his watch and exclaimed, "Look at the time! We'll be late!"

 The remaining bassists tried in vain to wake up their section mates, but finally those who were still conscious had to give up and run across the street to the Opera House. While they were on their way in, the bassist who suggested this excursion in the first place said, "I think we'll still have enough time--I anticipated that something like this could happen, so I tied a string around the last pages of the score. When he gets down
to there, Milton's going to have to slow the tempo way down while he waves the baton with one hand and fumbles with the string with the other."

 Sure enough, when they got back to the stage they hadn't missed their entrance, but one look at their conductor's face told them they were still in serious trouble. Katims was furious! After all... It was the bottom of the Ninth, the basses were loaded, the score was tied, there were two men out, and the Count was full.

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Last modified: August 05, 2006

 This site contains lots of music, some songs cover bluegrass, blues, country, rock and Christian Rock.  You will hear lots of raw searing guitar work along with some free song writing hints. Ensoniq keyboards is the main brain for my midi instrument programming. I wake up every morning singing and loving the country life of Tennessee. I do love to tinker on bass, I play all of the bass parts on my CDs. Songwriting has become a real art with me and I find myself indulging more and more into the unknown and untested. I can only create demos at this point because I don't have enough equipment to produce a quality cd. I read the bible for strength and inspiration. I pray for all the people who have done me wrong and hope that some day I can give them something to help their tortured souls. Crosses on the Highway is one way I have of giving. As I continue to produce I still can offer free mp3 files to download. these are short clips of all of my music for sale. There are lots of ways other musicians can contribute to this site. Would you like a site of your own? e-mail me